Juliet-M

It's been almost a year since my last entry, and I think I have a really good reason for writing it. Today is quite special day for me, cause tonight I finally felt something. That's it. Sounds pretty easy - to feel. I wouldn't say so. And it's not that I was depressed or something, not at all. I had a pretty good year: I went abroad to Germany for 2 weeks, I cleaned my head before going back to college after a year of absence. I watched many movies and TV series, went to cinema at least once or twice a month, went out with friends for a beer almost every week. Just enjoyed my life at it fullest. It all felt good, but nothing of it felt

Almost 2 months ago, on Christmas Eve I wrote a journal full of new New Year's resolutions, excitement and hope for a better future, I actually felt like I knew what I wanted in life and how to do it, but now?... I don't think so. The picture that I drew in my mind is getting kind of unclear and blurry and it makes me feel so frustrated and helpless and fucking angry with myself!!! How could I let the things to go this far, to the point I don't know what to do, where to begin fixing them??? So I decided to start over. I'm failing at college. So I decided to take a break until the fall to figure some things out, things like "Do I really want